Shattered Feelings
ROBERT
I stood watching, listening as Renee yelled and lashed out at me despite my begging her to calm down.
“You still haven’t told me all you know about me. You stalked me, right? You have the resources, so you did some background checks on me. So what do you know? Tell me, tell me! I’m sure you know all about my pathetic life and….”
“Renee, will you calm down. I don’t know what you’re talking about, but I can assure you that I barely know anything about you. I only…”
“Liar! I knew you’d say that. You kept your age from me on purpose, for chrissakes. You were scared I wouldn’t sleep with you if you told me you were twice my age, right? That’s why you upped your charm and made sure you had your way with me before telling me a thing. Then, while we were fucking like rabbits, I tried to ask you questions, but you diverted my questions over and over at every turn. Now you want me to believe you?”
“Renee!” I barked out, but she was still hysterical, her whole body shaking.
“I don’t trust you anymore. I can’t even trust you or believe what comes out of your mouth, Robert. I just can’t.”
Her words struck me like a blow, and a hiss escaping my lips, I recalled a similar scenario but with… No! I wouldn’t talk or think about that devil of a woman now.
I shook my head, fists clenched, and my countenance changed as I blurted out the magical words, hoping she’d listen, “I’m sorry, Renee. I sincerely apologize. I…”
“Oh, just cut it! Do you think saying sorry will solve anything? It won’t. When did you see me first? That night? Is it the truth? You haven’t answered my questions! I did ask you to reveal what you know about me, but….”
“The night I saw you at the beach was the first day I laid my eyes on you, Renee.” I deadpanned, my voice calm as I interrupted her, my eyes not leaving her face, as I stared intensely at her.
“That’s not the truth, Robert. I don’t know… I don’t believe you anymore.” She huffed, taking a step back from me and even though it was a subtle move, it felt like she was pulling away, and it hurt.
My eyes softened as they looked into hers and then I said hoarsely, “I won’t blame you for not believing me, Renee. But it’s true. I saw you for the first time that night. I’d been in a meeting with some of my clients when I caught sight of your….” I paused, the words on my lips dying immediately while she raised her brows, obviously wanting me to continue.
“Caught sight of what? You were saying something?” She urged on, and I let out a sigh.
“Beautiful hair and gorgeous brown eyes.” I replied softly, looking away from her and staring at the sea.
The wind billowed softly, carrying with it a heavy melancholy breeze that mirrored my feelings simultaneously.
The sun was still shining brightly though, and it made the tense atmosphere brewing between us seem warmer than it was.
“Those strawberry blonde curls….” I continued, “The dazzling milky skin that glowed and then the curves underneath your jeans. You’ve haunted my memories ever since that night I saw you, Renee. I knew I had to make you mine no matter what it took. No matter how I did it, I just had to have you and….”
Her eyes were watching me closely now, and I could see the hint of a smile playing on her lips, but she wiped it off just as fast as it came.
“And that’s why you stalked me? That’s why you did some background checks on me. I mean, what did you expect to find? Some hideous secret that’d make you push me away when we were done with each other, right?” She half yelled, her eyes fluttering wildly.
A heavy wind blew, shaking the yacht and cutting Renee off her incessant rant talks.
“What? What’s going on?” She asked, her eyes widening in fear as the yacht gave a small tug again, flailing against the water and I also tried to steady myself.
“Robert, won’t you….” Renee began as the boat shook violently, another dangerous breeze blowing and with a yelp, she stepped toward me for safety and tumbled into my arms.
“Renee…” I said softly, wrapping my arms around her, and she looked into my eyes.
The doe-like brown orbs trapped me again; even with her changing demeanor and messy hair, she still looked so freaking beautiful and so dangerous for me that it hurt.
Something about her innocence called to me, and I wanted to tell her just how much she meant to me.
I was slowly falling for this woman I’d only met three days ago. I couldn’t help feeling this way and there was no doubt in my mind that my feelings ran deeper than lust.
The longer I held her, the more I grew weak. This girl, this woman… She’d stolen my heart.
I’d grown fond of her in the short time I’d spent in her company. Her innocence, quirkiness, and beauty had become so familiar to me that the mere thought of losing her made my heart ache.
I didn’t need a reason at all, because just the sight of her vulnerable face made me lose control. What the hell was happening to me? I never fell in love. It was always the other way around.
Women flaunted themselves at me, begged for my love, and went to any lengths to get my attention, but I never gave in to their antics.
Now here I was, under the spell of a stranger. I was utterly under Renee’s spell and influence, and damn, if I didn’t try to convince myself that I was just fascinated with her.
This couldn’t be love, or was it?
She was still staring at me, saying nothing although her lips were quivering, and at that moment, with the sea dancing underneath us, I hesitated before leaning forward. Closing the gap between our faces, I softly pressed my lips against hers.
The kiss was gentle at first, with a bit of desperation and tenderness that left her breathless, and I deepened the kiss because I wasn’t stopping anytime soon.
My hands moved down to her hips, pulling her closer to me while my mouth opened and took all of her.
When her tongue brushed my lip, accepting my invitation, I moaned quietly and pushed intently.
Our tongues danced together, and my heart skipped a beat as she wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling me closer, one hand on my hair, fisting gently.
“Oh, Renee…” I mumbled. But that word was the beginning of my downfall because, in seconds, she pushed herself out of my grasp.
“We shouldn’t be doing this!” She spat out, her hands around her robe, pulling it at the ends, as she continued, “No, we shouldn’t.”
She took another step farther from me, and I noticed her shivering beneath her flimsy clothing.
“Are you cold?” I asked gently, finding my voice after some time.
“I’m not cold. I’m scared, and I just have this bad feeling around me. I need to leave this place, Robert. I want to leave.”
Her words sliced through my heart again, piercing through my memories simultaneously, as my mind was instantly drawn to past flashbacks. I shook my head, warding the thoughts away.
“You’re safe with me, Renee. No need to be scared, and we’re….”
“You expect me to believe you when you say I’m safe in your care? Never, Robert. I want to leave! I need to go back to Nicole and….”
“You want to leave? You want us to abandon all this between us and just leave?”NôvelDrama.Org (C) content.
For a brief second, she said nothing, and I saw pain flash across her eyes. But then her gaze hardened.
“Yes. Yes, I need to leave.”
“Maybe you should get some rest. You can go in the cabin, and then we can talk later and….”
“Don’t you understand that I need to see my friend?” I have to leave now, and I don’t care about . I want to go. Where’s my phone?” She asked and I told her where I’d put the cell phone.
“You do want to go. Guess we’ll have to cut our trip short then.” I said softly, the pain in my voice evident.
She said nothing, just nodding her head in response and that alone was enough to break my heart.
“Cool, I’ll drive us back to the dock. Luckily we’re not too far off.”
“Good, I’ll get dressed.” She muttered, turning around and walking toward the cabin.
“Fuck!” I cursed out loud as she left me alone.
The world started spinning, with everything looking like it was moving too quickly.
My hands gripped tightly onto the railing and I watched the sea waves billowing underneath, waiting for any sign that what had just happened was a mistake. Or maybe Renee would come back and apologize, wrapping her hands behind me and saying sorry in that lovely voice. But nothing of the sort happened.
Everything happened so fast and suddenly. From being close to my dream girl, and enjoying the feel of her body with mine, to being torn apart like this.
I couldn’t even kiss her freely and her behavior change baffled me.
I understood she was angry, but why? I didn’t get it.
I could barely breathe and as I walked away from the railing to my station at the yacht’s drive seat, I could only ask myself the same question over and over again.
What the hell had happened? How had things gone wrong so suddenly? Was this the end?