Leaving again
I’m uncertain about the time I drifted into sleep. The ache in my heart kept me awake, knowing what Heather was going through. I contemplate leaving her on the island to spare her the encounter with her father.
I awoke at six. Leftover food was a lot from the previous night, so I opted to reheat them. I also fried the remaining rice. As I reflect on the events, I catch myself gazing into space, letting out sighs. In an attempt to shake off fatigue, I brewed some coffee, but it felt like my emotions were becoming even weightier.
After preparing the meal, I entered the room to take a shower. Heather is still in deep slumber. Even after dressing up, she remains asleep. With plenty of time to spare, I chose to linger in the living room for an hour before departing.
While perusing my email, I take solace in sipping my coffee, trying to alleviate my stress. Lucinda’s door squeaks open, and she greets me with a smile.
“Good morning, babe!”
“Good-”
I released a sigh as the doorbell chimed. That man was back again!
“Heather is probably awake now; I’ll go get her…” Lucinda hurriedly entered the room, leaving me to open the door for Ivan.
I lethargically swung the door open. Ivan greeted me, freshly showered. I could detect the scent of his shower gel and his favorite cologne. Then he presented me with a bouquet.
“For you…”
“What are you doing here again?”
He gestured towards the unit across. I raised an eyebrow. Who lives there? Did he spend the night there?
“I rented it,” he replied with a smile.
“You slept there?” I inquired. Although I didn’t want to pry, I recalled Heather’s words from last night. It deeply hurt the child, thinking Ivan had left and gone to Maureen.
“Yes,” he smiled.
I still hadn’t accepted the things he brought-a bouquet and my favorite cake.
“May I join you for a meal?”
“Huh?”
“Can I have some dishes?”
“Are you now struggling with money?” He has the money to purchase flowers and a cake, but none for food. “Whatever!” I gave him a skeptical look, remaining in the doorway without widening it.
“Who are you talking to, Mommy?”
I glanced at Heather. When she saw her daddy, her face seemed to brighten, but it quickly faded, replaced by a sad expression.
“What are you having?” Ivan asked again, but I didn’t answer as Heather engaged me in conversation, expressing that she wasn’t in the mood to eat at the moment and would prefer to have her meal later.
I diverted my focus from Ivan and held the door ajar, giving him the choice to decide whether to enter or not. I abstained from directly inviting him or proposing that he join us for a meal, allowing him the freedom to choose his course of action.
“Good morning, baby,” Ivan greeted his child.
Heather glanced at the items he brought. It appeared everything Ivan had was intended for me; there was nothing for his daughter. She cast a hopeful glance toward the door, perhaps anticipating that her father had something else with him, maybe a gift for her.
“I…” Ivan turned his gaze toward me. “The toy store is still closed. I’ll buy you some toys later,” he assured as if he could decipher his child’s thoughts.
I proceeded to the kitchen, with Ivan following closely behind, retrieving a plate from the dish cabinet. He then took a seat at the dining table.
“After you finish eating, you can head out, and it would be preferable if you go back home. Don’t you have work at the office?” I admonished him.
Heather remained in the living room, captivated by the Barbie movie alongside Lucinda, allowing me to communicate with Ivan without any disruptions. Temporarily, I decided to skip my meal.
Ivan chuckled, “Okay, mommy,” he said, accompanied by a wink.
I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. While I was halfway through my meal, his plate remained largely untouched as he continued to gaze at me.
“Come on, finish your food. You mentioned you’d only ask for a dish,” I reminded him.
“Well, I do eat slowly,” he defended himself.
Shaking my head, I left him in the kitchen as I had to go. He pursued me.
“I’ll send you.”
“No need,” I promptly declined. I went over to Heather, knelt in front of her, and gently touched her cheek.
“Are you okay, baby?”
She nodded. I embraced her and whispered, “Your dad stayed in the unit across from ours last night.”
I smiled, observing her mood brightening. “Don’t be sad, okay?”
“Okay, mommy,” she said, offering a smile and planting a kiss on my cheek. After giving Lucinda some instructions, I noticed Ivan standing silently on the side.
“Let’s go…”
“Head to your job and don’t concern yourself with me,” I gently admonished him in a hushed tone to keep it from reaching Heather’s ears.
“I’ll just keep you company all day.”
I stopped in my tracks.
“You’ll only be a distraction!”
“Come on, Myla. I just want to be with you and make amends as well.”
“If you’re truly seeking to make amends, focus on your child. She cried last night, fearing you had returned to Maureen.”
“What?” He let out a sigh. “Is that what you’re thinking too?”
I held my peace, recognizing that my thoughts held no significance at that moment.
“We don’t have a relationship. I’ve made it clear to her that I can only offer friendship.”
“Friends with benefits?” I sarcastically asked.
“What? No!”
“Who are you fooling?! You can’t be friends with your ex who is obsessed with you.”
“But that’s true!” he insisted. “She’s sick, and her parents pleaded with me, so…”
“Okay, I get it. There’s no need to explain.” I turned away, but he stopped me.
“I understand it’s hard to trust what I’m saying, but believe me, it’s the truth. Myla, I love you so much! I know your heart is filled with doubt, but trust me, give me a chance. I’ll make it up to you and Heather. Even if Maureen needs me, I won’t go to her anymore. I won’t repeat the same mistake.”
I fell into silence, unsure of what to say. Fortunately, my phone rang, and I promptly answered. It was the person I was scheduled to meet with.
“Myla, I’m on my way. I’ll be at Shangri-La Plaza in twenty minutes.”
“Okay. I’m on my way too. See you.”
I glanced at Ivan.
“I have to go. If you’re not going to work, don’t bother me. We only have a few days left here in Manila. Make the most of them to be with your daughter.”
I hurriedly left. It would be embarrassing to be late for my meeting, especially when I was closer to our meeting place.
***
I’ve received text messages from Ivan, and his playful tone never fails to bring a smile to my face. Unconsciously, I catch myself grinning. However, I haven’t mustered the courage to respond to him yet.
Instead, I turned my attention to Lucinda’s messages. According to her, Heather accepted the toys and food that her dad bought for her. Ivan had a heartfelt conversation with Heather, explaining that he and Maureen were no longer in a relationship. Despite his apology, Heather remained silent.
“He said, ‘I lab u & ur mom. I knw I hurt her datz why I’m wlng 2 do evrytng so dat u wud 4giv me. I’m sori 2 4 hurtng you. I don’t wanna c u hurt bcoz of me. I don’t wanna c u cry bcoz of me.'”
I swiftly typed my response. “Your text is hard to read,” I complained to Lucinda. The message Ivan conveyed could have been touching, but her texting style made it challenging to appreciate.
She responded with numerous laughing emojis. “He mentioned more.”
“What else?”
“He sought Heather’s assistance to win you over so you both could go on a honeymoon.”
My cheeks flushed. “You’re insane!”
I’m sure she’s laughing hysterically at this point.
“Perhaps we should just leave you here with Heather. It seems like you’d rather work with Ivan.”
“No way! I prefer the island. There are plenty of attractive foreigners there.”
I refrained from responding to her as my new meeting had begun.
***
The entire day was tiring for me. I went straight home without doing any shopping. Lucinda mentioned that Ivan had gone grocery shopping, so there was a lot of food, and there was no need to cook for dinner.
Heather’s enthusiasm was evident as she welcomed me. I subtly nudged Ivan when he also tried to give me a kiss and a hug.
“Mommy, he said we would eat dinner at his unit.”
“Really? Do you want to see your dad’s unit?”
We exchanged whispers. Heather nodded.
“Do you want to make sure he slept there last night?”
She didn’t respond.
It appears that my child has a knack for investigation. I can already envision her as a young lady, with a boyfriend or husband. Those men better be on their toes. I just hope she doesn’t end up with someone who will deceive her.
Wow, I’m getting ahead of myself. She’s still a baby, and I don’t want her to grow up too fast.
“What’s on our dinner, Lucinda?” I pretended not to know that Ivan bought a lot of food.
“Your hubby bought four dishes.” It seems like this one received some kind of bribe.
“I’ll just change my clothes.”
After changing, we visited Ivan’s unit. I couldn’t help but find amusement in Heather as she thoroughly inspected the two rooms and the bathroom. Even the areas under the beds, cabinets, and tables didn’t escape her scrutiny.
“Did you find anything, police officer?” Ivan asked with a laugh, visibly pleased by his daughter’s actions.
“Maybe you told her to leave in the meantime.”
“We can check the CCTV if you want,” Ivan suggested.
Heather shook her head. She seemed convinced. I just hope her father won’t let her down again.
We had dinner, and later, we watched a movie. Heather and Lucinda were lying on the round memory foam that Ivan had set up on the floor. I was reclining on the sofa, while Ivan occupied a nearby single sofa.
“It’s more comfortable if you use my thighs as a pillow.”
I brushed off his attempts at flirting. He appeared to believe everything was fine between us, but that was a definite no. I couldn’t see myself trusting him again. If he’s patient, he might earn back my trust, but if not, that’s okay. He has the option of another woman elsewhere, just not with Maureen. She isn’t a suitable match for him.
Before the movie concluded, Heather had already drifted off to sleep.
“Let’s sleep here,” Lucinda suggested.
I glanced at Ivan, who was leaning on the single sofa.
“Yeah, you can sleep here. Our daughter is comfortable. It’s just me who isn’t.” He stood up and approached me. Is he going to sleep beside me? I felt alarmed.
He pulled the bottom part. Oh, it’s a sofa bed.
But if he sleeps here, it would feel like we’ll be sleeping side by side.
“You have a room, you know.”
“I want to stay here. We won’t be too close. Just let me be next to you.”
“If she doesn’t want it, we can be the ones next to each other,” Lucinda teased, laughing.
I chuckled too.
Ivan, with a smile on his face, looked at me. I pursed my lips and turned serious.
“Goodnight. I love you.”
Lucinda made a sound while I quickly turned around, feeling even more awkward as Ivan stared at me.
***
We enjoyed a peaceful night’s sleep, and all woke up simultaneously for an early morning breakfast. Ivan is scheduled to go to work today.
“I’ll be working only half a day today. I’ll also be coming home in the afternoon. Is there anything you want Daddy to buy for you?” he asked his child affectionately.
“I want chocolate.”
Ivan grinned. “I thought you didn’t like chocolate because it might ruin your teeth?”
Heather couldn’t meet his eyes, which made him chuckle before tousling his daughter’s hair.
“I’ll buy you a lot of chocolate. Wait for Daddy.”
***
I left the condo with a sense of contentment after exchanging texts with Ivan earlier. Our conversation solely revolved around Heather’s interests.
As the afternoon progressed, I got caught up in various tasks, neglecting to check my phone. Ivan and Heather might already be spending time together.
Later in the afternoon, I got a text and missed calls from Lucinda. She said that Heather was crying because Ivan hadn’t shown up. Ivan had sent me a text at two in the afternoon, explaining that he had an emergency meeting.
I opted to head home, as the plans I had for five in the afternoon didn’t hold significant importance. Prioritizing my time with my child took precedence.
Heather was in tears, feeling distressed. I took the time to explain to her the nature of her dad’s job and how demanding it can be. I also provided insights into how a business operates. She listened, though I’m uncertain if she fully grasped the details.
By six in the afternoon, Ivan hadn’t arrived, and there was still no text from him. It seemed he might be significantly delayed.
We proceeded to finish our meal, and Heather continued to wait for him.
“Are you okay?” I asked, observing her frequent glances at my phone and toward the door.
She shook her head slowly.
“Let’s just watch a movie,” I suggested. Perhaps Ivan would arrive after we finish one.
“Lucinda…” I glanced at Lucinda, who was engrossed in her phone. She quickly stood up to fetch the remote control, turning on the news. I furrowed my brow.
“News flash. The child of a business tycoon and the grandchild of the former mayor of Cavite is currently in the hospital after being involved in an accident.”
We gazed intently at the TV. Maureen was the one mentioned in the news. According to the report, the accident occurred earlier in the afternoon.
“So that’s why Ivan hasn’t come. It seems he’s at the hospital.”
I contemplated confronting Lucinda, but I chose to let it pass. Heather needed to understand the reality that her daddy and I were not okay. Eventually, Ivan would marry someone else, and our daughter would have half-siblings.
There’s a pang in my chest because I had believed Ivan could uphold his promises. He failed once again. Nevertheless, I must come to terms with this. Maureen has always been more important.
I empathize with Heather, but I believe that eventually, she’ll reconcile with our situation. It’s painful, but eventually, she’ll overcome it.
I embraced Heather and waited for her to speak.
“Mommy, let’s go home…”
“Okay, baby. We’ll head home tomorrow morning.”
“I want to go home now, mommy!”Text property © Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org.
I pondered for a moment.
“Alright.”
Lucinda and I shared a glance.
“Okay, I’ll start packing then.” She promptly rose and entered our room to begin packing.